AYNSLEY:
Now that I am back in NY, I am in catch up mode. I arrived home at 1am on Friday morning and worked two long, full days. Tomorrow I have the catch up of homey details: laundry, bill paying, food shopping, filing my taxes (oh, man, taxes). And hopefully sleep. Though daylight savings time is not the best weekend to catch up on sleep...
I spoke with Mom very briefly today-she was sleeping, but woke up as I called and said hi before falling back to sleep. The usual fatigue, but I think deep sleep is really good for her. She ate modest amounts today, which seems to be the norm. Usually there's one meal that she really likes of the three and she'll eat half or more of that, and then about a quarter of the others. Not great, but consistent. Now that the feeding tube isn't an option, I think all of us want to get as much food down as possible, but Mom describes herself as having no appetite and being uncomfortably full most of the time. When I ask her why she can't eat one more bite, she says she's too full. Wasting away is a common cancer side effect, I know. It's just that I have spent my life surrounded by Jewish mothers and my default impulse is to feed in every situation.
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